Saturday, 18 December 2010

6 Things Men Need to Hear

By Alina Mikos

Some things so often go unsaid in relationships, eventually causing disharmony and misunderstandings between couples. Communicating honestly with one another is the only way to build upon and improve your relationship; otherwise the partnership can’t grow. As the gender with better communication skills, it’s up to us to deliver some straight talk, even if some men are reluctant to hear it
1. I need you to do romantic things for me, no matter how long we’ve been together.
The only way romance dies in a relationship is if both people stop trying. Generally, men need to work harder at romance, as it doesn’t come as naturally to males as it does to females. Romantic gestures do not always have to be elaborate or expensive (maybe you can save those plans for the bigger occasions such as your anniversary), so let your guy know that the little things do count so very much. Letting him in on the secret that receiving flowers never gets old, cooking candlelit dinners earns major points, and impromptu intimate massages will increase the chance that he’ll get lucky that night will set the stage for you two to stay romantically in love indefinitely.
2. I want kids, and if you don’t, you need to tell me now.
Most men balk at the idea of siring the next generation, and since women know this, they tend to shy away from handling this topic in a straightforward manner. Choosing to avoid an uncomfortable conversation, women hope that with time, a man will soften and change his mind about having cute little toddlers running around. As this is a deal-breaker for most women, why string yourself and him along? Instead of breaking up five years down the road because he’s unwilling to budge on the siring subject, give him the skinny straight up. Either he loves you enough to commit to having children with you, or you reset your sights on the right man for the job – someone who will love you and your children.
3. I forgive, but don’t forget.
You will both make mistakes in your relationship, but as long as you show each other respect and remorse, forgiving one another will be the key to recover from the experience. Let your guy know that you forgive him for whatever he did, but if the incident was serious, make sure he understands that your forgiveness does not mean it never happened. Doing this makes him own up to his choices, and lets him know that while you are compassionate, you are not a fool. He’ll respect you more for it.
4. I’m not your mother or your maid, so clean up after yourself.
Falling victim to the stereotype that men can be sloppy, you may find yourself constantly picking up after him and his clutter. He may have grown up having these things done for him by his mother, but as an adult, it only becomes acceptable if you allow it. By communicating that you see it as disrespectful, if he cares about you, he will work on developing the habit of picking up after himself.
5. Just because I’m better at cooking and cleaning doesn’t mean I want to do it all the time.
Typical gender roles still imply that it is the woman who often does the cooking and cleaning around the house. As most women now work outside of the house as much as in it, it is only fair to expect the man to help out. To some guys with good mamas who taught them well, this can be second nature. Unfortunately, most men still seem to lack basic household skills; that doesn’t have to mean that he gets out of chores. If you are frustrated that he doesn’t pitch in around the house, let him know it. Work out a compromise that satisfies the two of you so that you don’t resent doing all the upkeep, and ultimately, the relationship.
6. Groping and foreplay are two different things.
When it comes to the bedroom, the more honest you are about your pleasure, the better he will be able to give it to you. As it takes men significantly less to reach their pleasure peak, he may not realize that a few minutes of “warm-up” may not be enough for you. Unless he’s a selfish lover, he will want to learn how he can better please you, and nothing feeds the male ego more than a well-satisfied lover

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